Kimi B Ley

From life as a beach bum scuba instructor in a bounty ad., to the joys of englandshire-upon-sewageville...Hugs and I'll blow some bubbles for ya

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Dive Signs and the Duke of Depravity

So my allies, I must admit to bumping into kukskalle nej tumme once or twice on pp, and may have finally washed that one out of my system...no more brain fog relating to him!!!

Cutting the story short and sweet, after an "incident" I may have eventually lost my rag and told him precisely what I thought of him...along the lines of how I wouldn't consider touching him with hazardous waste gloves on given his history, that really he was morally repugnant, or at best ambivalent and a disgusting example of a human being(thanks for that one Bridget Jones). As he accused me of attempting to annihilate his character I respectfully invited him to dispute a single thing I had said as being anything other than fact, that if it were mere subjective opinion I would recind, reconsider and apologise. Unsurprisingly he was unable to do so. I may also have put to him that he would have to remain where he was as he wouldn't be accepted anywhere else, and that his friends are his "friends" because they live the same lies...aging hippy obsessed with his d**k, which if he continues with his preference for ladies of the night will probably rot and fall off.

Now this was not without its triggers, along the lines of a female friend of his had attempted to punch me one night in a drunken rage due to me catching her cheating without her b/friends knowledge(who happens to be a friend of mine). The duke of depravity was phoned by the wailing, sobbing, acting, drunk cow who asked him to come and collect her as I was beating her up!!!! The bloody cheek...she even shouted at me "watch this" as she suddenly put on the tears and phoned him. Perhaps I may not have minded if I hadn't warned her 3 times to go home and talk or argue with me when she was sober (and had gone through puberty), and hadn't caught her as her drunken attempt to punch me in the face went wide and she went to fall on her face. All I actually did to her was grab her and put her on the floor to stop her pulling my hair and trying to slap me in her wildly flailing manner. And to think it really wouldn't have taken much more than a look to have knocked her out. Such drama eh? hehehe, would make a great Sun photo story.

Well actually its all very boring unless you were there or live on a tiny island where that kind of thing is big news. Anyway suffice to say that I saw the frankenhanded fool for what he really is, and didn't find anything about him remotely attractive...would have thought that since he'd known me for 5 years or so that he'd know I don't start fights, especially with pointless 19 yr olds. Saw that he texted me only when he was lonely, horny or needed an emotional crutch to lean on. Little bit out of order though when you consider I spent 3 or 4 months of last year stopping the bloke from killing himself post-tsunami, but hey disposibility eh?

So, my friends and me may have invented a new dive sign!!!! Basically coz you can't talk easily underwater, divers communicate with a series of hand signals, including quite a lot for the animals we see. The sign for moray is pretty universal but now may the addition of wiggling your thumbs wildly and laughing, in memory of his thumb being bitten off by one of these esteemed critters. Meow!

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